1931 Was A Long Time Ago

I left work Friday night and headed straight to Monroe. The drive from uptown Charlotte to Monroe sucks. It really sucks at 6:00 on a Friday. I wasn't feeling particularly well for some reason. About 5:30 pm, I felt a bit vomitous. Enough so that I actually went to the bathroom at work in preparation for a vomit session. This may not be weird to most of you, but I haven't puked since 2002. Before that, I hadn't puked since 1997. I reckon I have a strong stomach or something. Anyway, I staved off the sickness. It lasted the entire way to Monroe, then went away. I don't know what it was.

Oh yeah, I was headed there for my Aunt Agnes' 75th birthday party. It was a small affair in the basement fellowship hall of her church. All it took was some potato chips, peanuts, cake and punch to get rid of the nausea.
Aunt Agnes is as alert as she ever was. She's 75 in number only and shows only one sign of slowing down. She doesn't drive at night. Other than that, she's not changed anything in her life. She's my dad's half sister which I suppose makes her my half aunt.
My dad's side of the family is pure Union Co. They all go to church every Sunday and sing in the choir. My cousin Scott isn't a minister, but sort of is. I'm not real clear on it, but he's licensed to do weddings and funerals and spends a good part of his week visiting folks in the hospital. I enjoy hanging out with this side of the family because they are so damned funny. When they all get together with my dad and tell old stories, they all pee themselves laughing. It's funny to see Dad get that cracked up.

My cousin Wayne is one of the most entertaining people I know. He's 56 years old and we're pretty sure he might be gay. He was married once for nine months. He told me a story Friday night about a date he went on thirty years ago. He took her to a gospel sing, which is a very, very, very southern christian music show. My yankee friend Ryan Nation affectionnately refers to it as, "Jesus Country Music." Anyway, she got mad because the folks in the church at the gospel sing stood up and started speaking in tongues and doing all sorts of crazy dances. Wayne said he didn't understand what the big deal was and thought it was a good place to take a date.

Wayne may not be gay, but he did take home the red and green birthday balloons because he likes those colors.